Howling at the New Moon

You may be wondering what I thought of "New Moon." Here's my summary:

and

Am I clear? 

Now for my real review.   

I am going to start with a list of Things I liked and/or things that have improved since Twilight:

1.  Jacob Black.  I was with the people that were crying "Recast!" after the first movie.  I just didn't see how cute little Taylor Lautner, who looked like a 12-year-old girl in Twilight, could pull off the towering, muscle-bound werewolf in New Moon.  But I think he managed to pull it off.  Don't you?  (See above picture.)  It's amazing what people will go through for job security.  I never had any problem with his acting in Twilight, and I was still quite happy with it in New Moon.  He had the right amount of intensity during his angry moments, and his big, flashy white smile during the friendly moments was well-timed and as warm as I had expected from Jacob.  There was an audible gasp from everyone in the theater when he pulled off his T-shirt to wipe the blood off Bella's forehead.  And then a lot of tittering from the older women because they (we) felt a little ashamed at gasping at his beautifully sculpted chest.  I think I've made my point.

2. Bella's devastation.  I have been an overemotional teen dumpee, and I think the way they conveyed Bella's isolation after Edward leaves is spot on.  Showing Stephenie Meyer's 250 pages of depression (ragged hole in the chest, zombie behavior, missing Edward desperately) couldn't have been all that easy.  Sitting at the vampires' lunch table alone, sitting in her room, watching the world go by outside her window, and ignoring her friends all seemed pretty accurate to the book and to real life teen angst over the loss of a boyfriend.  I had some issues, of course, with certain aspects of the angst, both in the book and the movie, which I will discuss in my list of Things I Didn't Like.

3. The Volturi.  There are definitely casting issues with this series, but the casting they did for the Italians was great.  I'm glad they cast a British guy as Aro.  There are plenty of fancy-looking American actors that would have looked the part (most of the cast of any CW show, for example), but he needed to sound like he'd been around for a long time.  The solution:  a British accent.  I loved that they really went to Italy to film the outside parts (thanks to a nice fat budget).  I loved that they could afford to cast Dakota Fanning and then give her a total of about 5 words in the whole movie.  And I liked that they added a little fighting with the Volturi at the end to create a climax that didn't exist in the book.  On the big screen, all the talking the vampires do would have been a snoozefest.  The decision they made to add the fighting was fun and exciting.  Overall, the whole Italy scene was one of my favorite parts (I say overall, because again, I have some issues to discuss).

4.  Make-up/costuming/hair.  The first movie had a low budget, and I think they hired their 8-year-old daughters to do the makeup for the vampires.  Remember the first time you see Dr. Cullen?  Yikes.  I don't know if it's that they could afford someone better, or better products, but I appreciated the toned down makeup in New Moon.  They were still pale, but not cakey.  When Edward showed Bella his sparkly skin in Twilight,  it looked more like he was really sweaty.  He looked much more diamond-like and sparkly in New Moon.  The vampires were supposed to be wearing pricey designer clothes in the first movie, and Edward seemed to be wearing Walmart T-shirts a lot.  I loved the clothes he wore in New Moon.  My favorite outfit of his is what he's wearing when he dumps Bella.  It was the closest he came, for me, to being untouchable and intimidating.  I mentioned hair in the title of this section because of one vampire, and that is Rosalie.  I thought they did a horrible job casting Nikki Reid as Rosalie after seeing the first movie.  Then I saw a picture of her with brown hair, and she's gorgeous!  When they went to dye her hair blonde, it went badly, and fried her hair to death.  And they found out that blonde hair doesn't really suit her.  So I was pleasantly surprised by how much better her hair looked in New Moon.  I'm guessing she was wearing a wig, because after the awful experience she had with the first movie, I doubt they risked frying her hair.  Whatever they did, she looked much prettier this time.  (Maybe I'm just used to her now...) 

5. The special effects.  What a vast improvement.  They figured out that you can show speed without showing Edward's legs flailing about under his body.  Just a nice whoosh past the camera is all you need to get the feeling of speed.  It was such a relief.  When the Quiliute boys morphed into wolves, it was seamless.  (I will leave my rest of the comments about the wolves for the next section...)  The fight sequence in Italy was nicely done.  Oh, and I loved the part when the wolves were chasing Victoria and they showed everything else slow down instead of trying to speed up the chase.  I can't say everything was perfect, but it really is amazing to see what a big budget can do for a movie.

Now for my list of Things I Didn't Like:

1. The wolves.  Since we just talked about how much special effects improved, let's discuss what didn't work.  I know it must be extremely difficult to do CG animals.  Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban proved that no matter how much money you have, creating a werewolf can go terribly wrong.  And it was necessary to use CG for this film, because of the impossible dimensions Stephenie Meyer gave them, not to mention the restrictions placed on animal use in movies.  There was a lot of wolf fighting, and I doubt PETA would have appreciated real wolves fighting.  But it just wasn't convincing enough.  Thinking back, I think it was the snarling snouts that looked weird to me.  It made parts that should have been dramatic and exciting a little laughable.  Maybe they'll make even more money on this one and have a chance to rework the wolves into more realistic beasts. 

2. Bella's bedtime screaming.  I know she was sad, and really really missed Edward.  I hated it in the book, and seeing it on the screen made me hate it even more.  Ugh.  It made me squirm in my seat.  Again, I have been a teenage dumpee, and I took it extremely hard.  But I just don't think, no matter how sad a girl is, she'll be screaming in her sleep every night.  I could understand it if she was having nightmares about Jasper eating her alive.  That would make me scream.  But the ragged hole in the chest is more of a dull ache, not a sharp pain.  Lame lame lame.

3. Edward.  Yes, 5 gazillion girls around the world just gasped in horror.  But I gasped in horror when I saw this:

I'm sorry, but when you've just seen Jacob with his shirt off, this is really gross.  Where do I even start.  Isn't Edward supposed to have a sculpted, smooth, marble chest?  I'm sorry, but how does emaciated and hairy fit that description?  If Taylor Lautner, who had the body of a 12-year-old, can gain 20 lbs of muscle between movies, why can't Rob Pattinson?  And while he's at it, pop on over to the salon and get a wax job.  Please.  Please please please.  The whole time his shirt was off, I was thinking "Please put that nice shirt back on.  Please."  I have no problem with chest hair as a rule, but in this case, it is NOT right.  How about, instead of scrawny, weird-looking Rob Pattinson, we sub in him: 

Not too shabby, right?  He is also a vampire, on the CW show "The Vampire Diaries," which is also about a vegetarian vampire that falls in love with a mortal girl.  But he looks more the part, he acts more the part, and he is much much better looking.  I don't mind if they switch up the actors.  Hint hint, Summit Entertainment.

My overall conclusion is that I need to go see it again.  When I saw Twilight the first time, I was so focused on the problems (make-up, Rob Pattinson, bad special effects) that I missed some of the good.  This time I think I was focused on the wolves and Rob Pattinson's scrawny chest, and I missed out on some of the enjoyment I may have next time.  So before I can give it a thumbs up or down, I will be seeing it a second time.  Call me if you want to come along!