Not sure what to say

I went to Breaking Dawn Part One last night.  I went in having read the book so there were no surprises when it came to the storyline. So, as always, I will list my likes and dislikes of the movie.


Likes
1. The wedding and honeymoon.  I remember, when reading the book, wondering how in the world they were going to get parts of it on film and keep the rating under an R.  And apparently, it took the filmmakers quite a bit of effort to keep it at PG-13.  If you look at my review of the book you will find that one of my least favorite parts of the book was the overdone wedding and honeymoon section, because it took FOREVER to get through all the descriptions.  For some reason, however, the first 30 minutes of the movie were my favorite part.  The setting for the wedding was beautiful.  The filmmakers clearly had their target audience in mind when they selected the dresses, the decor, the music, and even the shoes.  The speeches added humor and started the film with a nice, light mood.  The honeymoon scenes, as naughty as they could have been, were pretty tastefully done, thanks to the editing department (see interviews done after the actors finished shooting it--apparently things were getting out of hand and they managed to clean it up a lot).  Bella's attempts to seduce Edward after he nixed anymore...encounters, shall we say...were funny and sweet.  Kind of weird that the part I liked the least in the book ended up being so much better in the movie.

2.  Edward's appearance.  I think Rob Pattinson finally hit puberty, or maybe all that hanging out with Taylor Lautner inspired him to hit the gym.  He seems to have filled out a bit.  I don't know if it's just that the wardrobe department figured out how to dress him better.  Maybe it's a combination of both.  And his hair, for the first time, didn't look like a gel-covered rat's nest.  They seemed to have backed off on the white makeup, too, thankfully.  It was the first time he looked remotely attractive to me.  It was a nice change.

3.  They made fun of the name Renesmee.  Thank you.

4.  I got to see a preview for The Hunger Games movie, which looks promising.

5. I was with my friends, and it's always great to have a friend sitting by you that laughs at the same things as you, and will tolerate the snarky comments that you throw at them throughout the movie.

Dislikes
1.  Oh, those wolves.  There are some things that just don't work on film.  Like a showdown between werewolves that only communicate psychically.  What it reminded me of was watching a Japanese anime movie with really bad dubbing, only instead of their mouths moving, the wolves were snarling and baring their teeth.  The fact that it was meant to be one of the most dramatic parts of the movie and the entire audience was laughing instead made me wonder how something that horribly bad made it to the theater.  I'm wondering if, like the publishers for the Twilight book series, the movie producers figured they'd make a gazillion bucks no matter what garbage they put on the screen.  (They were right, of course, although I'm not going back for a second screening.)

2.  What the heck was going on with Emmett's hair?  He just looked weird the whole time.  He used to be the hottest Cullen, but I was kind of disturbed by his appearance this time.  I wonder if they realized that he was outshining Edward in the hotness department, so they deliberately made him look funny.

3.  Speaking of hair, I missed Alice's spiky fun 'do.  I don't like change.

4.  The baby delivery scene was gross.  And I've been there in person three times now.  I just kept thinking, Please wipe off that baby (that looked like it was 9 months old).  Please clean off the gore now.  It was disgusting.  I know they were going for realism, but realistically, the reason they have all those towels is to clean up that baby as soon as it's out, so no one has to get covered in goo.  And they just wouldn't wipe off poor Renesmee.  And Edward, while you're at it, just wipe off your mouth really quick.  I had no problem with screaming (been there), grunting, cutting her open, and sound effects as the baby comes out.  But just clean things up afterwards.  Please.

5.  Did I mention the wolves?

6.  After Bella got pregnant, the whole movie got really angsty and gloomy.  There was just no humor.  There was some cheese, a lot of Edward trying to look upset, and a LOT of Bella looking like death slightly warmed over.  (Kind of like the book, but on the screen it was just worse.)  There needed to be moments of levity to break up all the bleakness.  And lameness.

There you have it, folks.   Just a note.  My husband just informed me that Breaking Dawn made $72 million yesterday.  So what I just said here doesn't really matter all that much, if we're being honest.  A franchise is a franchise.  I'm not going to be going back for a second theater viewing.  I think I'll stay home and watch Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2 again instead.