Reality Wrap-up

As you all know, I'm a bit of a reality TV junkie. I have been glued to my favorites in the past few weeks, just waiting to see who would get the mirror ball trophy, the Cover Girl contract, and the Kiss of Death recording contract. So, here's my take on all the outcomes, for anyone who also cares.


America's Next Top Model This will be brief. The doe-eyed blondie really suprised me when she pulled out a good runway walk in the finale. I think they must have chosen her worst walking moments when they were editing the show so we would all be stunned by the fact that she could walk in heels with sass. Tiyana (is that how it's spelled?), who looks a bit alien, or, as the judges put it, "wind in the face," ended up winning it all. Good for her. Her pictures were consistently good, she had a tiny waist and was 7 feet tall. But her walk was BOOOOOORING. Not at all sassy. I am looking forward to the next season, which is short models only (5'7" and under). Why didn't I try out for it? I didn't want to upstage Tyra.

Dancing With The Stars My favorite moments from the finale:

1. The Roast, which made everyone look angry and hurt, because it really wasn't all that funny, and made it awkward for the next little while. Who thought it was a good idea to sit down the finalists and insult them right before their final dance? The comments Geoffrey Ross made to Tom Bergeron fell especially flat. I have never seen Tom look so put out or unjolly.

2. Steve Wozniak's attempt at the worm, AGAIN. He couldn't do it the first time. It was cruel to ask him to repeat himself. And it was much much worse the second time. Poor nerdy man. He is so cheerful about it all, and a bit oblivious, too.

3. The fact that all 3 dancers in the finale were good. I think Shawn Johnson totally redeemed herself in the last 2 weeks. And you know it's going to be a winning freestyle when they rip off their outer costume layer to reveal lots of sequins and fringe. The flashdance thing was fun, if only for the combination of a hot man and catchy music. For me, what I liked about Melissa's was that Tony was doing hip hop, and seems like a pretty laced-up guy. Shawn totally won that round.

The outcome was surprising to me, but after Geoffrey Ross' comment about Melissa coming in 2nd again, I was actually glad that she got 3rd instead of 2nd. I really wanted her to get 1st place so she'd be known as the girl who won DWTS, and not the chick that got dumped on national television. Oh well. She'll be just fine. It would have been nice for Gilles to win so he could be known as the DWTS winner and not Naked Guy from Sex and the City. Oh well. He'll be getting more work now. Shawn Johnson is short and peppy and cute, so good for her.

American Idol So, who do you choose? Super talent or humble folksy guy? The thing is, winning American Idol doesn't mean that much. They get to make an album of songs that were chosen by AI's producer, most of which are cheesy and lame and never make it to the radio. They get the talk show circuit. And they get a really nifty microphone trophy (they were jealous of DWTS). Winning second place means a label will sign you, you can choose your songs or even write them yourself, you still get the talk show circuit, and you are free from Idol forever. Downside: No cool trophy. I think the outcome of this season was actually quite ideal. Kris is somewhat shy, young and humble. He doesn't seem like the type that will put a huge effort into his career by selling himself. So American Idol will do it for him. Adam Lambert is flashy, showy, dramatic, and extremely sure of himself as an artist. He'll get a record deal, record songs that are perfect for his fans, and make a gazillion dollars. They both win. I liked Kris' reaction to his win. He was surprised, humble, and very pleased.

You may have noticed that I don't have a nice long post about the outcome of Biggest Loser. That's because Helen won, and she sent her own daughter home, she was annoying and whiny, and looked like she'd been starving herself to win (haggard and pale). I wanted Mikey to win. Good job to the old guy, Jerry, for destroying the competition at home. That's all I have to say.

Coming up this summer: So You Think You Can Dance and the Bachelorette. Yes!

Getting My Brain's Groove Back

I have a couple of friends whose blogs are always extremely intelligent and witty, and I don't think it's a coincidence that both of them are avid readers (links to their blogs are listed on the right). After my pathetic post about my fuzzy brain, I decided I was going to make an effort to reawaken my rusty brain by following their examples and reading books that require some thought. I love that our library has a website that allows you to find a book and request it from any of the libraries in the county. I think this is pretty standard these days, but I never truly appreciated it until I started dragging two kids into the library, grabbing little hands that were ripping books off the shelves, hauling a heavy baby carrier behind me down narrow aisles of books, only to find that the book that was supposed to be on the shelf was nowhere to be found. It's glorious to walk up to the desk and have all the books my heart desires in 2 minutes. So when I read Jenny's review for "The Little Giant of Aberdeen County," I requested it immediately. While I was on her blog (Red Hot Eyebrows), I scanned through some of her older posts, and requested "Paper Towns" as well, because it sounded intriguing. I'm giving you links to her reviews because they say everything I'd like to, and, although reading these books gave my brain a jump start, I'm still a little sluggish, and Jenny is not.

I am going to tell you what I think of both books, though. Just not in as much depth and detail as Jenny. Starting with "Paper Towns," by John Green. First of all, a warning: this book is about 18-year-old guys that may not share the same standards as other boys you know. In other words, there's a bit of swearing and some less-than-appropriate dialogue that takes place. (Think of Juno.) However, the dialogue is very real and relatable if you can overlook the language. The main characters are band geeks and nerds, so I felt a kinship immediately. The main character is also the narrator of the story, which I enjoy, because it allows you to see inside his head and experience his emotional journey. This novel explores the differences and similarities we share as the human race. It reveals the limitations we put on ourselves and each other by defining ourselves as a "type" (popular, band geek, nerd, jock, jerk). It really left me thinking about how others see me, and how I view myself. Does my behavior reflect who I really am? Do people really know me? And do I really know other people? And ultimately, how do we deal with the challenges we face? See, my brain really got working with this one! And the great thing about this book is that all those questions are wrapped neatly into a fascinating story that keeps you riveted until the last page.

"The Little Giant of Aberdeen County" by Tiffany Baker is actually quite similar underneath the story. Like "Paper Towns," the narrative is in first-person. The narrator is Truly Plaice, a giantess in a small town. She endures persecution by the small-minded (hee hee) people in the town, who only see her as a hulking nuisance that offers nothing to their town. Her sister is the town beauty, which emphasizes Truly's size and ugliness even more. As she gets older and continues to be treated poorly, she harbors resentment and anger deep inside. She has two good friends, who are also outcasts. Each of them deals with what life has dealt them in different ways. The way they each react to their difficult lives made me stop and consider how I react to adversity. Do I become vengeful and bitter? Do I focus on something I love and let criticism roll off my back? Or do I clam up and become eaten up inside, allowing myself to waste away? The characters in this book are complex and real. They all have faults and weaknesses, but each of them has something redeeming in their make-up as well. It's how they cope with the hand life has dealt them that reveals who they really are. I think this is a great book group book. There is a lot to discuss, yet the story moves along well and captivates the reader well. I tore through it because it was so interesting.

It was so refreshing to read books that didn't involve magic wands or elves or mind control. Just good stories with lots to think about. Thanks, Jenny, for mentioning these books. Now I'm going to get onto Rachel K's book reviews and find some more treasures.

A smattering of thoughts

I spend all day with a 3-year-old and a baby, and lately my social life has been nearly non-existent, so I have had very little practice with the social skills, plus my brain power is nearly kaput because of an overdose of the Disney channel. This is entirely my fault. Well, mostly. I couldn't help that both my kids got sick, and as soon as it was looking like we were back in business, I got sick. That was a bit out of my control. On top of that, every time I start a book that requires even the smallest amount of focus, I get bored with it and have an overwhelming desire to read the Georgia Nicholson books (they're fab, British, and very silly, but not very thought-provoking). As a result, I have found myself walking away from every conversation I've had with an adult feeling like a complete idiot. I think in the course of three weeks I have probably offended and alienated every friend or chance of a friend I may have had. Nice work, Rach. So, if you are one of those people, I'm sorry. My brain is mush and I'm on very little sleep. I didn't have the best social skills to start with, but in this condition they are disastrously lacking. Okay. Now that I have apologized, I have a request. Please tell me, how do you stay sane when you're stuck with sick little kids and you can't get out much? I love going out and having fun, but it doesn't really seem in the cards right now. What are some other options?

On another subject, I have been meaning to address the issue of Twilight for quite some time. I did a review of it a while back (Rachel K, thanks for the tutorial on doing those fancy links to other posts). I believe my review was favorable-ish. I commented on how annoyingly bad the effects were, and how caky Dr. Cullen's make-up was, and how overly red Edward's lips were, right? I also mentioned that Rob Pattinson was absolutely not the right man for Edward's role. After multiple viewings, I'd like to amend my review (Karina, you were right). Yes, all those things were wrong with the movie, but on the small screen they were barely noticeable. I watched it with my husband, and was on the edge of my seat, just waiting to point out Dr. Cullen's bad make-up, but when it got to that scene, it just didn't seem that bad anymore. Same with Edward's lips. The effects were still bad, and Tim did laugh with me at the tree-climbing scene, but I got over it quickly because I was enjoying the movie so much. After 3 viewings, Pattinson seemed more and more right for the role. I think it was kind of like when Smallville came out, and, as hot as Tom Welling was as Clark Kent, he wasn't Dean Cain (I loved Lois and Clark). After a few episodes, I got over it, and now Tom Welling is just fine as Superman. Of course, no one can replace Christopher Reeve. But I digress. I had a completely different mental picture of Edward from reading the books. It was cemented into my brain, and I was stubbornly sticking to that image. But you can't deny the appeal in the brooding, serious version Pattinson portrays. My mom compared him with James Dean, and I think that's when I was won over. I am convinced that a low budget movie like this is meant for the small screen. So, if you haven't seen it yet (Rachel K), rent it, watch it 4 times, and then form an opinion. Then tell me what you think! If you have seen it, didn't like it the first time, and haven't watched it again, rent it, watch it 4 times, and tell me what you think. And buy the soundtrack and listen to it with the volume way up. It's awesome.

Wicked Awesome

I finally have something interesting to blog about! Tim and I finally left the house! Without the kids! I happened to be in the right place at the right time, and was lucky enough to buy tickets to Wicked from a friend whose family vacation interfered with her tickets. (Thanks again, Jackie.) This was a big deal, because it's not every day that a bigtime musical like Wicked lands in Salt Lake City, and tickets were sold out so fast that I didn't even have time to check the bank account to see if we could afford to go. So I snatched up the chance and the tickets, and Tim and I went on a real date for the first time in ages. As soon as I had the tickets in my hands (actually, stashed very safely in a place little grubby hands couldn't find them), I downloaded the soundtrack and listened to the music daily in preparation, and encouraged Tim to do the same.

I'm not sure if it was the fact that it had been years since my last real musical experience, or if it was that the kids weren't with us for the first time in a year. Maybe it was just the combination of fabulous costumes, exciting music, and pumped up crowd at the theater, but I found myself struggling not to cry at the end of every big number. I had heard the music before, and I knew the basics of most of the story, but experiencing the musical up close with a live orchestra made it so much better. When I saw Les Miserables at the Capitol Theatre I think I had a similar experience, except that I was on the back row of the balcony behind a pillar. The Capitol is a smaller theater, so even on the balcony you still get a fabulous experience, but this time we were on the floor, close enough to know what the actors' faces actually looked like and never having to strain to see or hear anything that was happening.

Without giving too much away (I'm guessing everyone will eventually see this musical, and you know a movie version will show up in a few years), let me give you a quick rundown. Wicked is the story of the Wizard of Oz from the Wicked Witch of the West's point of view. It explains why she's green, why she cares about those silly ruby slippers so much, and why she's so darn bitter and angry. You find out her history with Glinda the Good Witch, and what's going on with the talking lion and Dorothy's other pals. To me, no matter how good the music is, if the story's lame, it's a waste of good music. This was no waste. Great story!

I love love love the music. When I was listening to it on my ipod, there were certain songs I didn't really get. When they were put into context in the theater, they were powerful and moving. My favorite musical moments from the musical were Popular (hilarious!), Defying Gravity (my mom tells me all her students want to learn that one--it's even better once you see it on stage with the costumes and cool staging), No Good Deed (that when I let the tears start falling), and Changed for Good (I was trying not to sob openly). The orchestra was awesome, and all but keyboard and rhythm was done by local musicians. Go locals! The singers were also excellent. We got the understudy for Glinda, but she was still quite impressive. The girl singing Elpheba was incredible. She was powerful and I thought her acting was also very good. Fiyero had a great voice, but his acting seemed a little stiff. The rest of the cast was great. The music did not sound easy to learn, and the ensemble was tight and in tune (hooray!).

I took my husband, who had never been to a musical before. That was the real test. Would he like it? Well, the next day when we were driving to Salt Lake for an Easter party, he asked me to turn on the Wicked soundtrack. It passed the test. I think the combination of a great story and really wonderful music on a colorful and interesting stage makes it accessible to everyone, even musical newbies.

On a completely different subject, what has happened to all the jelly beans? I looked and looked and found one bag after 3 stores! Does anyone else think it is a travesty that no one's selling the Starburst jelly beans anymore?

An overdose of Shannon Hale

My mom has been organizing and cleaning out rooms in her house, which has resulted in bags and boxes and stacks of free books for me! Two of the books she gave me in the latest batch were Enna Burning and River Secrets, both by Shannon Hale. They had colorful and appealing covers, which is why I chose to read them. Both books are sequels to The Goose Girl, which my husband and I listened to 3 or 4 years ago on a road trip. When I "listen" to a book on a road trip, what I'm really doing is snoozing against the car door until the CD is done, which prompts me to wake up long enough to put in the next one. So after reading the second and third books of the Bayern series, I decided to read The Goose Girl for real. While I was on the library's website requesting that one, I was reminded that I had wanted to read Book of a Thousand Days and Austenland, also by Shannon Hale. I requested all three of the books, and they were ready for me this past week. So here I was, with 3 books to read, wondering how I would get through all 3 before the due date. Done, done and done! It helps to have a sick kid, the Disney Channel, and bad weather all converge into one week. When you're trapped inside for 8 days and you can't take another episode of the Imagination Movers (I'll have to blog about them another time), it's nice to have some easy lit to help you tune out the zany antics of Rich, Scott, Smitty and Dave (yes, I know their names).

Here's a quick review of each one:

The Goose Girl (and Enna Burning and River Secrets): Shannon Hale admits in an interview at the back of the books that her weakness as a writer is being slow to get into the story. Amen, sister. Goose Girl was especially slow at the beginning, partly because she was carefully setting up the background for a world she was planning on staying in for several books. One advantage to taking time building the story, however, is that she also builds the main character into someone you understand. Ani, Enna, and Razo, the main characters for each book, have histories to them that explain their actions and drive the story. This series explores the relationship between the characters and the basic elements of nature surrounding them. For Ani (also called Isi), it's animal speech and wind speech. For Enna, it's fire and the internal battle she faces between her desire to do what's right peacefully and the need to burn everything to the ground. For Razo, it is his attempt to figure out the intentions of a woman whose communication with water may be used for good or evil. The world Hale has created is detailed and interesting and easy to accept. My one complaint with her writing is her habit of reusing phrases a lot when describing feelings. I've read 5 of her books in the past 2 weeks, and she loves the use of "yawn in the chest." The 452nd time I read it I yelled aloud, "For crying in the mud, come up with a different phrase!!!" They are fun and wholesome books overall, though, and I'd recommend them for 10- to 16-year-old girls especially. (There's some romance, of course.)

Austenland: Eh. Great idea, bad execution. Not that I could do better. Here's the rundown: A thirty-two-year-old single woman who has had a number of failed relationships clings to the hope of a Colin Firth-esque Mr. Darcy romance. She is obsessed with the 5-hour Pride and Prejudice movie, hides her DVDs in the houseplants, and watches it time after wretched time to drown her sorrows after each boyfriend doesn't measure up to Mr. Darcy. Her rich Great-Aunt discovers her unhealthy obsession and tells her to snap out of it, dies, and leaves her a trip to a theme park--a Jane Austen theme park. They dress in the clothes, they lead lives of leisure, the men go on hunts and speak politely, and all modern technology is banned (except modern make-up, which is encouraged). Sounds fun, right? Well, we find our heroine trying to cast off her obsession with Mr. Darcy and find true love all at the same time. The idea behind the story is great. It's obvious Shannon Hale was among us college students who devoted every Saturday to either P&P and a pan of brownies or Anne of Green Gables and a tub of ice cream. I can relate to the character in many ways (a trail of bad dating experiences is related throughout the story), but I don't like the style she uses to tell the story. It's choppy and hard to follow (kind of like this post, I think, which is why I won't ever attempt a book), and a bit on the predictable side. There you have it.

Book of a Thousand Days: I loved this book. Loved it. It started out a little on the slow side (just like the other books), but the best part of this book was discovering the story page by page. The story is set in a land similar to Mongolia (yaks and mare's milk and the like), and is divided into several kingdoms. The book is set up as a personal journal, written by a lady's maid whose employer is locked in a tower on her first day of work. The Lady Saren has refused the hand of a powerful man and betrothed herself to a kinder man from another kingdom. Her father locks her in a tower and tells her she must stay there for 7 years, so she can consider her poor choice and make the right one. The maid swears an oath to the Lady, follows her to the tower, and slowly discovers her own strength and abilities, while attempting to find her Lady's. It's hard to explain. Just read it. I love the story, and the way Hale tells it. It's touching and sweet and romantic. It's about finding your strength in the face of adversity, and about finding beauty inside others. I'm making it sound cheesy, but really, it was just a nice story that I think most will enjoy.

Okay, this has turned into a much longer post than I was planning. Sorry. I have been reading a lot, and I figure it's either that or telling you all about Mickey Mouse's Clubhouse. Now you have some new books to look up at the library. They're great for a snowy day (or week).

Ballroompalooza

The Bachelor is so two weeks ago. Now it's what I consider the best time of year: Ballroom time! And what better way to celebrate Ballroom Time than by kicking it off by watching "Strictly Ballroom"!!! ("Pam Short's broken both her legs, and I want to dance with you.") If you've never seen this movie, and you like quirky and silly, you MUST see it. I insist. It's directed by Baz Lurman (is that spelled right?), which means it's packed with brightly colored costumes and funny makeup and dance numbers. Kind of appropriate for a movie about ballroom dancing, right? I have enjoyed this movie since I saw it clear back in the early 90s, and I will continue to enjoy it until Tim and I can enter the "over 50s" dance round. (Tim doesn't know this yet.) The plot is simple: Plain-looking, mousy beginner Fran approaches dashing, flashy open-amateur Scott and asks if he wants to dance with her. This goes against ballroom etiquette and propriety, and on top of that, they want to make up NEW STEPS!!! Oh, it's shocking alright. Does that get you hooked? It should.

Following a very necessary viewing of Strictly Ballroom, a healthy dose of "Dancing With the Stars" is in order. Yes, it's that time again! I love that they have 3 seasons a year! This season is as starless as usual (Jewel was the biggest star there, and dropped out due to injury, to be replaced by a Playboy bunny). Some of the super stars involved this season are Jewel's husband (I don't remember his name, but he's a rodeo star), Belinda Carlisle, Steve-O from the show Jackass (I only know who he is because he and his buddies did a photo shoot with ANTM), and Denise Richards. Nancy O'Dell was one of the stars, but at the last minute got injured and was replaced with...drum roll please...Melissa, the girl that got dumped on the Bachelor! Awesome. I feel bad for her, because when they introduced the other celebs, it was, "the actor" or "the rodeo star" or "the Grammy winning rapper", and with her it was, "Let's show a clip of Jason dumping her!" And now she's famous for getting dumped on TV. I just hope this show goes better for her so she can be introduced at the next reality show she's in as "the winner of Dancing with the Stars!" She only had 2 days to learn the waltz, and I thought she was great. It helps that she used to be a Dallas Cowboys cheerleader. Back to the show. The reason I believe it's important to watch Strictly Ballroom first is so you can compare Len Goodman to Barry Fife, and Edyta to Tina Sparkle. Bruno Tonioli is a creature that can't be compared to anyone. Unless you can think of a really annoying Italian that feels a need to come up with really bad alliterative phrases to describe the dancing. Yikes.

Some of you are probably thinking, why watch ballroom dance? I watch for the completely ridiculous costumes, the live band (yes, Harold Wheeler's band is awesome--how many bands have you heard pull off the Star Wars theme and Sir Mix-a-Lot in the same night?), and the sparkly shoes. And the secret hope that somehow I will become famous and get to be on the show. Did you see how much weight Marie Osmond lost?

The Biggest Loser (and I'm not talking about the show about losing weight)

Alright, you knew it was coming. The Bachelor just wrapped up this week, and I need to give my 2 cents about the outcome. In keeping with the Lord of the Rings references (since they were in New Zealand, after all), I'd like to compare how things turned out with that part at the end of Return of the King. You know, where Sam has just carried Frodo up the mountain, Frodo is so loveable and pathetic, and you are so glad he has finally made it to Mount Doom where he can toss the ring in and save the day.

It came down to Jason choosing between Melissa and Molly. At our house we were cheering for Melissa. She was cute, nice, genuine, sweet, and Jason's little boy seemed to like her right away. And 3-year-olds are pretty intuitive about people. Molly seemed a little fake and shallow, and Ty was afraid of her at first. So Jason rejected Molly and proposed to Melissa. Hooray! Frodo makes it to Mount Doom and all seems right. Then in the After the Rose ceremony, Jason comes out and says, "I am going to dump Melissa and see if things will work out with Molly." At the last minute, Frodo puts the ring on to claim power for himself. Suddenly he looks a little demented and possessed, and his appeal goes down the toilet. You think, NO! After everything you just went through? How could you?

Here's my theory about Jason. He spent the whole season talking about Molly's eyes and how whenever he saw them, he was hooked. Molly's eyes are the One Ring. They have possessed him and, not being fortunate enough to have a deranged creature bite his finger off and land in the lava with the ring, Jason has now succumbed to Molly's hypnosis and Melissa is gone. I see Melissa as Sam, but in a totally different way romantically, of course, since there's none of that going on in LOTR. She didn't hypnotize Jason, she won him over by being awesome. She kept him from being possessed by Molly's eyes. She was cheerful and helpful and nice, just like Sam.

Since this is a match-making show that is ridiculous in every way (really, basing a decision like marriage on limited time with girls that are being handed drinks every 5 minutes and that have cameras on them ALL the time is not reality), I don't really think you can make a judgement call about whether or not what Jason did was right or wrong. It's TV, and there's a producer calling the shots and manipulating different situations. But isn't it fun to talk about it? I love TV!

By the way, for those of you who care, Jillian is the next Bachelorette. I'm looking forward to her Canadian accent.